next post: when my bedroom drops below 87 degrees in the middle of the night
6.28.2010
I'm Melting
heat and humidity make adam a lazy llama
next post: when my bedroom drops below 87 degrees in the middle of the night
next post: when my bedroom drops below 87 degrees in the middle of the night
6.14.2010
Eric Ronning you are my HERO
Squirrels are the worst thing ever. Before I left for THE DISTRICT! this weekend I watered the plants, said my goodbyes to each and every plant and made sure Dave was available to water when I was gone. When I got home yesterday I bounded up the stairs to greet my babies and OHHHH GOD THE HORROR!!!!
The zucchini, flowering so beautifully after less than a week in the ground had only one flower left! Did they die? Did the rain wash them away? Were the stems too weak to hold up to the elements? NEIN, NEIN, NEIN! The greedy squirrels must have sensed I was gone for the weekend and attacked (I'm almost positive my musk is a squirrel repellent). In fact, Friday afternoon, while walking down the National Mall in THE DISTRICT! I was stopped by a squirrel. I posted the picture to Facebook, thinking nothing of it.
http://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?pid=34188914&id=34200024
In my period of bereavement and reflection, I think that squirrel was taunting me. He knew his Brooklyn brethren were feasting on freshly grown zucchini flowers. Ugh, how could I be so foolish! I'm angry, confused, disappointed and scared. WORST.THING.EVER.
Side note: Serena passed her polygraph this morning. I'm 99% sure she didn't take a chomp of the zucchini flowers.
Ok I'm done grieving. Now it's time for some action. Dave is off to Maine for the next few days so he won't be able to hear me sobbing but he did leave a voicemail with some advice. If I spray the plants with some sort of spicy pepper solution the squirrels will probably not like it and will probably stay away. However this is too much chance, too much "probably". So I did a little research. Below is the best website EVER. Eric, if you ever read this blog, THANK YOU. I'm so glad there are other people out there that hate squirrels as much as I do.
http://www.getridofthings.com/get-rid-of-squirrels.htm
Ok-time to dry my tears, research Eric's website and turn on a tribute to my new hero, Eric.
The zucchini, flowering so beautifully after less than a week in the ground had only one flower left! Did they die? Did the rain wash them away? Were the stems too weak to hold up to the elements? NEIN, NEIN, NEIN! The greedy squirrels must have sensed I was gone for the weekend and attacked (I'm almost positive my musk is a squirrel repellent). In fact, Friday afternoon, while walking down the National Mall in THE DISTRICT! I was stopped by a squirrel. I posted the picture to Facebook, thinking nothing of it.
http://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?pid=34188914&id=34200024
In my period of bereavement and reflection, I think that squirrel was taunting me. He knew his Brooklyn brethren were feasting on freshly grown zucchini flowers. Ugh, how could I be so foolish! I'm angry, confused, disappointed and scared. WORST.THING.EVER.
Side note: Serena passed her polygraph this morning. I'm 99% sure she didn't take a chomp of the zucchini flowers.
Ok I'm done grieving. Now it's time for some action. Dave is off to Maine for the next few days so he won't be able to hear me sobbing but he did leave a voicemail with some advice. If I spray the plants with some sort of spicy pepper solution the squirrels will probably not like it and will probably stay away. However this is too much chance, too much "probably". So I did a little research. Below is the best website EVER. Eric, if you ever read this blog, THANK YOU. I'm so glad there are other people out there that hate squirrels as much as I do.
http://www.getridofthings.com/get-rid-of-squirrels.htm
Ok-time to dry my tears, research Eric's website and turn on a tribute to my new hero, Eric.
6.10.2010
Oops I blogged my pants
I just can't help myself today! I am too excited about the garden to not do two posts. Today has also been pretty momentous. Not only was it my tallest friend's birthday (diorama gift pictured above) today but I also got to see Hot Dog lady molest someone! On our walk back from the Pearl St. Diner Hot Dog lady, looking as elegant as one can in an azure Quaker Oats Hoodie, shuffled up to a delivery guy unlocking his bike. With one last puff of her stubby little cigarette, she lifted her hands and BEGAN TO STROKE THE DELIVERY MAN'S PONYTAIL. I shit you not, she actually starting petting him and pulling on it. I thank the Hot Dog gods that I was not alone to witness this because it was too good to be true. Her biggest supporters were with me (thank you Chul, Claire, AVH, Kerri, and Jen for not making a scene and letting this play out).
So go ahead and judge Hot Dog lady all you want but I will defend her decision. The man's hair was oil slick black and looked smoother than a baby's bottom. Unless she thought it was a really burned hot dog and was trying to eat the guy. In that case, BAD HOT DOG LADY!
MORE PICTURES YIPPEEE (notice the change in the zucchini plant already - it has 3 more flowers than it did on Sunday!)
Zucchini Sunday, 6/6/10:
Zucchini Thursday, 6/10/10:
Here are some more views of the deck this morning:
"This mint is squirrel proof" - Serena after attacking the bush like a vodka soaked squirrel
HEEEEEEEEEEEERBS
your.moms.urban.garden...now with more pictures!
Two posts in four days! Whoa! Someone’s on the ball! How exciting!
First off, thanks to Dave’s extremely patient dad for hanging around our apartment while we took the car to go to the Gowanus Nursery to pick up all of the plants. He even helped carry up 6 bags of soil and 1 enormous package of peat moss (take notes Wynn Phillips)! We owe him big time.
So once Dave got back into Brooklyn on Sunday we carried 6 large bags of organic potting soil and one larger than life palate of peat moss up to the roof. For those of you who haven’t been to my apartment, that’s like 4 flights of (oddly) steep stairs. We filled the large planter with a layer of peat moss. If you remember from previous posts, we had already drilled drainage holes in the bottom, covered them with metal mesh and lined the inside with a plastic bag. This was to ensure that no chemicals from the treated wood leeched into our soil. We had some left over soil from Serena’s previous attempts at a (failed) garden and some other soil from the herbs we planted and this formed the base for our garden.
Peat moss loosely in place, we filled the rest of the planter with really rich organic potting soil. On top of that we laid out the vegetables in a zigzagged pattern. The directions recommended 18-24 inches between every plant but that’s just crazy. How big can these plants get (this question is not to be answered in the comments section)? Obviously we didn’t follow the rules and I am predicting an extremely lush oasis of tomatoes, peppers, zucchini and strawberries.
After we planted the veggies in the box we whipped out the secret weapon...THE TOPSY TURVY. Topsy Turvy is an elegant plastic piece of white trash hanging from the lintel of the rear facade of our house. As Anne McYawnfest so enthusiastically demonstrates in the video, it’s great for tomatoes.
However, we threw caution to the wind and planted A ZUCCHINI PLANT INSTEAD.
You might all think we are the badest of badasses in the gardening community (and you’re right to think so) but we can’t take all the credit for planting zooks instead of tomatoes. If Anne’s lazy ass watched past the 0:58 mark of the Topsy Turvy advert below, she would have found that you can also plant “cukes” (ew, and I’m not commenting on the taste of cucumbers. I’m commenting on the taste the word “cukes” leaves when it rolls off your tongue...BLECH ) peppers and herbs. So cram it Anne McLazybones and gimme a call when you and your yardlover.com posers decide to come up with something better than a half-assed version of the original Topsy Turvy commercial. Take some notes from surprised blonde middle-aged woman #1 in this video and let us know when you’re ready to tango.
Ugh. Now I’m all hot and bothered so here are some soothing pictures of our flowers, hanging from the industrial chain link fence and stolen-from-the sidewalk table. Sit back, relax, and let the menopausal woman inside of you indulge in this:
BAH! CAROLE! WHAT’S THAT CAT DOING THERE!?!
6.08.2010
Recap (sans pictures)
As Benjamin Linus once said, “Destiny is a fickle bitch”. So wise his words, so terrible his series finale. I promised in my last post that I would add to the blog more regularly and unfortunately I feel that I am destined for far fewer posts than I had anticipated. After watching the piece of garbage that was the LOST series finale, I became extremely ill. Hallucinogenic fevers, unending nausea and loss of appetite were just three of the symptoms I caught from that trash bag of a series finale. So this will be a recap of sorts.
April
I had intended to title this blog post “Brooklyn Hipsters Are Useful?!”. I’ll save you all the drunken details but Dave and I went to a party in Crown Heights that his former roommate Danny was hosting, and by hosting I mean was caught in the midst of. Some Jewish guy out in Bay Ridge owns the building where Danny lived and he basically gave one of the girls who moved in years ago free reign to rent up the building with whomever she wanted. They slowly created an artists cooperative-type building, complete with art installation parties and a communal chicken coop in the back. Hmm. A racial and socioeconomic segregated neighborhood, angst-y white artists who need to spend their parents money wisely on rent....all signs point to hipster-dom.
Fortunately, these folks were reasonably talented and incredibly well organized. During the party, the top floor apartment was made into a bar run by a girl who just happened to be A REAL LIVE URBAN FARMER. I’m sure Dave’s enthusiasm and mine did not impress her, especially since we were 3 drinks deep, but she did play along and offered some solid advice. Zucchini became a definite no for growing in the middle of the garden. It wants to curl around everything and overtake anything it can get its vines on. Potatoes would need more depth. That’s all I really remember. I was more focused on the predator issues. From her experience chicken wire is the only effective way to keep squirrels out.
May
The weather was spectacular and the herbs were growing like WILD. We made another trip to the nursery to pick up vegetables and some flowers to spruce up the newly cleaned deck. Once again, the women at the nursery said it was too early for some veggies and more herbs would have to keep us busy for a few more weeks. We bought some pansies to put in a window box, which T-shirt expertly pruned (sorry Shirt-they look pretty wack now). We bought a small basil plant and luckily it survived some cool nights. We also fixed our watering problem. With access to a car and dogged determination, Dave went to Home Depot and bought a hose and an adapter. We unscrewed the tip of the faucet, placed the adapter on it and can now pop the hose onto the faucet. The hose hangs out the bathroom window and runs all the way to the top of the deck where we have an adjustable garden nozzle. This has made our life much easier. Instead of running up and down the stairs 6 or 7 times with a pitcher of water we can run up and down the stairs 3 times and have unlimited water (special thanks to Dave for taking the initiative to buy the hose and teaching me how NOT to flood the entire bathroom with water at 7:30AM...again).
June
DISASTER STRIKES AGAIN!! This time it was the most natural of predators...the sun! Dave went out to Long Island for a few days and I was so sick I could barely fart without crapping my pants. Needless to say, very little watering was done and just our luck, it was above 80 degrees everyday. I do have to pat us on the back for the resiliency of our herbs, though. Not one of the bushes died due to our negligence. The only casualty was a bush that neither flowered nor was edible (waste of time!). We can also probably use the dried stems and leaves for our brand new compost (holler!). I don’t know much about composting but I do know that our refrigerator doesn’t smell like a dirty diaper from old veggies that were being saved for said compost. I can’t smell it from my window either so it must be working (buzzkill- we learned it takes months before the compost dirt is usable-doh 2.0).
As trigger happy as we were, we didn't plant any real vegetables until this past Sunday. I have some pics to be posted soon. So far we have planted:
3 Tomato plants (Italian, grape and Amish/heirloom)
1 Arugula, genetically modified to include Chris Hansen repellent
2 Zucchini (one in the planter to drape over the side, 1 in a TOPSY TURVY)
1 Green pepper plant
1 Serena Vaccarino approved strawberry bush
We also plan on maybe an eggplant and some more herbs. Stay tuned for pics!
April
I had intended to title this blog post “Brooklyn Hipsters Are Useful?!”. I’ll save you all the drunken details but Dave and I went to a party in Crown Heights that his former roommate Danny was hosting, and by hosting I mean was caught in the midst of. Some Jewish guy out in Bay Ridge owns the building where Danny lived and he basically gave one of the girls who moved in years ago free reign to rent up the building with whomever she wanted. They slowly created an artists cooperative-type building, complete with art installation parties and a communal chicken coop in the back. Hmm. A racial and socioeconomic segregated neighborhood, angst-y white artists who need to spend their parents money wisely on rent....all signs point to hipster-dom.
Fortunately, these folks were reasonably talented and incredibly well organized. During the party, the top floor apartment was made into a bar run by a girl who just happened to be A REAL LIVE URBAN FARMER. I’m sure Dave’s enthusiasm and mine did not impress her, especially since we were 3 drinks deep, but she did play along and offered some solid advice. Zucchini became a definite no for growing in the middle of the garden. It wants to curl around everything and overtake anything it can get its vines on. Potatoes would need more depth. That’s all I really remember. I was more focused on the predator issues. From her experience chicken wire is the only effective way to keep squirrels out.
May
The weather was spectacular and the herbs were growing like WILD. We made another trip to the nursery to pick up vegetables and some flowers to spruce up the newly cleaned deck. Once again, the women at the nursery said it was too early for some veggies and more herbs would have to keep us busy for a few more weeks. We bought some pansies to put in a window box, which T-shirt expertly pruned (sorry Shirt-they look pretty wack now). We bought a small basil plant and luckily it survived some cool nights. We also fixed our watering problem. With access to a car and dogged determination, Dave went to Home Depot and bought a hose and an adapter. We unscrewed the tip of the faucet, placed the adapter on it and can now pop the hose onto the faucet. The hose hangs out the bathroom window and runs all the way to the top of the deck where we have an adjustable garden nozzle. This has made our life much easier. Instead of running up and down the stairs 6 or 7 times with a pitcher of water we can run up and down the stairs 3 times and have unlimited water (special thanks to Dave for taking the initiative to buy the hose and teaching me how NOT to flood the entire bathroom with water at 7:30AM...again).
June
DISASTER STRIKES AGAIN!! This time it was the most natural of predators...the sun! Dave went out to Long Island for a few days and I was so sick I could barely fart without crapping my pants. Needless to say, very little watering was done and just our luck, it was above 80 degrees everyday. I do have to pat us on the back for the resiliency of our herbs, though. Not one of the bushes died due to our negligence. The only casualty was a bush that neither flowered nor was edible (waste of time!). We can also probably use the dried stems and leaves for our brand new compost (holler!). I don’t know much about composting but I do know that our refrigerator doesn’t smell like a dirty diaper from old veggies that were being saved for said compost. I can’t smell it from my window either so it must be working (buzzkill- we learned it takes months before the compost dirt is usable-doh 2.0).
As trigger happy as we were, we didn't plant any real vegetables until this past Sunday. I have some pics to be posted soon. So far we have planted:
3 Tomato plants (Italian, grape and Amish/heirloom)
1 Arugula, genetically modified to include Chris Hansen repellent
2 Zucchini (one in the planter to drape over the side, 1 in a TOPSY TURVY)
1 Green pepper plant
1 Serena Vaccarino approved strawberry bush
We also plan on maybe an eggplant and some more herbs. Stay tuned for pics!
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